you know,
it's really difficult to stay in a place which you already condemned as somewhere which will hinder you.
every moment that i stay here is a pain, a suffering, and time wasted which i will never get back.

like i told ahyi,
whatever i gained here, the me which grew here,
it's not worth it at all. so not worth.
yes undeniably, i grew so much here.
but this growth, wouldnt be of any difference if i were to stay in singapore.
i didn't have any exceptional discovery of myself which i thought i would gain.
instead, i grew to hate this place and how it made me changed.
i became someone i dunoe anymore.
someone whom im ashamed of.
someone who is pessimistic, unhappy, miserable, etc etc.

this has been such a lousy overseas experience for me.
in the very first month here, i was happy.
and as time passes, i realised that it just sucks.
my life paused ever since i came here.
i need my life back.
i need the real me back.
i need to go back to singapore before all these drive me crazy.
i'm gonna go insane.
i am wasting my time, wasting a part of my life which i will never get back.
i have already wasted four months of my life.
this is so not worth it.
i cant take this any longer.
lee jia le, i need you back so damn much i need you back.