my journey.

Running w tay last night and I got overloaded w so much thoughts that I din have the mood to continue anymore.
He continued the run alone and I started to ponder while enjoying the alone time.
I started thinking on this journey of mine.
The journey of life.
I have no idea exactly how long I have left in front of me, and I just keep walking.
Maybe I should do some meaningful stuffs here and there but what is meaning?
Isn't it just smth intangible that people hold onto to be hopeful?
I started searching inside, the deepest layers.
How do you really feel?
I realised I am someone very bad at expressing myself, but I keep trying anyway.
And I hate silence, I need some noise or smth all the time.
I wonder what it be like if we made different choices.
I talk to myself a lot, I reenact scenes that happened and think of the things I should have said or did instead, smtimes in public.
And then I get dirty looks from people and realise that I have been acting out the whole time, facial expressions included.
Retarded but I kind of like this kind of interactions w myself.
I will be great in the future.