90% for overseas internship

had our overseas internship briefing today.
and i feel like i'm really interested in going. even though it's china. but it still looks kind of fun.

i have always been afraid that if i go, i wouldn't be able to get a proper job. cause i wouldn't want to do housekeeping like alot of my coursemates are doing now.


now, 90% for overseas internship, and i am alr starting to miss the people around me. D:

teared when i talked to mrtay, thinking how i would miss him and my family and my friends and everyone here.
thought about how we would most probably contact once a week for six months, or technically 22 weeks, which means 22 times for the whole internship program. a chance to test our r/s since he wun have much time for me during that time with the start of his course in sept.

he said he will come visit me before the start of his course though, meaning the start of my internship, and the end of his course in jan. but he would have to help with his family business D:
hope that he can come visit me during his bday though, so that i wun miss it. but it's not like he cares abt birthdays anyway, and it clashes with cny so forget it. CHEH!

internship will end on our first year anni 11th feb. and i wonder if it is the day that my work ends or the day that i am coming back to singapore.
sigh he also hopes that i'm overseas so wun distract him cause of his busy course which has only a passing rate of 33%. poor boy. who ask you so mean want chase me away!? KARMA HAHAHAHAHAHA /laughs wickedly


asked qiqi if she will miss me if i go overseas for six months and she said most probably.
OMG can i survive out there without my mum to help me do stuffs and my sisters to beat and bully!? D:

never did survive without them for so long. at most one week. never stayed away for even a month. now i'm supposed to leave them for six months!? D:
and how do i get a sim card there? how do i contact my family back at home!?!?

what about my friends? will they miss me while working and we can't meet up for meals cause there are like huge seas and lands in between us!? D:

i'm such a worrywart that i am truly and really afraid that something will happen when i am away. i know CHOYYYYY!! but i want to be here when anything happens.
IF ANYTHING SERIOUS HAPPENS WILL I BE ABLE TO COME BACK TO SINGAPORE!? D:


so many thoughts going through my head right now. :/
on the other hand, SOOOO MANY PEOPLE are encouraging me to go. mrtay, my parents, friends. what more can i say?

a little voice in me tells me to go and check out those places that i have never been to before. yet another voice keeps asking me those what ifs which is really irritating. AND THERE IS THIS ADVENTUROUS PART IN ME WHICH SAYS TO BE CURIOUS AND EXPLORE!! D:

i should probably consult ong may leng.