okayyyyy it's hbm tutorial now and im totally not listening. i din do the tutorial too hahahaha. was dead tired when i got home last night.
think i will be doing projs almost EVERYDAY after school like wad i did for the past two days but argh that's our lives. :( we cant do anything about it except wonder why we din start earlier. HAHAHA.
feels like ages since i last blogged. :/:/ been so busy. even clara and ahyi have been complaining that i practically disappeared in the two weeks hols. :(
being caught up with the thai trip and bamp and christmas and countdown and practically did work with them for only like two days. :( i feel super bad alr i will try my best to do more.
okay tutor just asked a volunteer to go up to the board to answer the qns and he asked me to in the end even though he said VOLUNTEER. hahahaha. ok not that i mind. cause luckily that qns wasnt hard HAHAHA and at least i could fill in the blanks and he is nice to point out that i made a small mistake kekeke.
had been rather happy today though i looked tired and even clara asked why i was pulling a long face for almost the whole day. :( but i was tired. but my heart is smiling all along HAHAHA ohmy so cheesy.
just wanna say i thoroughly enjoyed dinner with ahyi and clara last night. hahahaha. laughed like crazy and ahyi laughed till she cried listening to clara and my conver though we found it normal. we are far too lame. HAHAHAHA.
okayyyyy i shall blog soon about BAMP and then countdown and then society 0910 outing~
i just wanna note down impt memories here. heh heh.
sometimes i feel like i want time to stop now. like seriously now. i dun wanna grow older i dun want anything to change i just want everyday in the future to be like now, the present. now somehow feels like the best time i have for quite some time and i dun wanna lose it. i feel more independent than ever. i feel more sure of myself. i feel more confident (despite growing fat HAHAHA) and i feel like i can handle stuffs more and im more certain of my future and where i wanna go somehow. i also feel the happiest now. with every single person in my life now which i want to treasure dearly.
maybe now is the transition of me becoming more of a woman and less of a girl (though i still kinda behave like a child HAHA) but i feel like i can do this. is it cause im reaching the age of 19? noooooo i dun wanna REALLY grow old. and i dun wanna REALLY become a woman. just refusing to leave the comforts of being young and thus always forgiven for the mistakes made and brave through the real cruel society and thus taking responsibility for every single thing that you do. kinda being selfish here. but if i want to, i think that i will be able to. able to take up responsibilities and do work well. i just need to jiayou somemore. :)
and chatting with von during the society outing about our future and the age we wanna get married at. we need to find a partner soon in order to date for like a few years before getting married HAHAHA.
and mr tayyinji is right somehow. the present is the most impt. the past has already passed and there is nothing we can do to alter it. and we shouldnt dwell about the things that we did in the past and let it bring us down or make us feel inferior. the future is unknown and uncertain and there is nothing we can do about it too. even though they always say what you do in the present would alter the future, but you can't exactly predict what chances or opportunities would be presented to you, or what kind of people would come or leave your life then, right?
ahhh i love writing this kind of stuffs. make me feel like i understand life better. and it's like im being more real to myself and people around me. and i will feel a little deeper about stuffs. or maybe im actually a really shallow kid who just thinks too much? but every single trivial thing that people says to me somehow matters. and i do spend time thinking about it. be it compliments or criticism. we should always try and improve ourselves and become the best person in the world. and by the best person i don't mean like the most successful person or wad. though that is somehow impt as well. but more imptly, we should become the nicest, kindest and the most real person. everyone has faults, such as being selfish, conceited, greedy, short tempered etc. but we should try and minimise these faults as much as possible so as to become the best person. at least thats what i think. which is certainly not what everyone thinks. and thats why there are people who crave for power, authority and money and would do any kind of underhand means in order to achieve them.
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