i feel like crying now. tears are already coming up. if you are my friend, dun ask anything. dun ask if i am fine. i dun want you to ask. i dun like showing my vulnerability. i am a weird person. i just wanna vent here.
fuck i am becoming such a vulgar person. fuck comes out of my mouth so easily now. i am keeping so much things to myself. i dun smile as much. i dun go crazy as much. i am becoming someone whom i dun even know. i dun even understand. arghhhh. i hate myself i hate myself.
i was so cheerful. i was so happy. i was so high and crazy and could laugh at even the smallest things. i was so innocent and gullible that i get cheated by the smallest things. i was so childish and naive and had the wildest imagination which made me feel happy thinking about it.
but all has changed.
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