`38th post

ahhhhh!!
im emo-ing AGAIN!!
heard some stuffs today.
reallie wanted to share wif boyboy.
but im sorry dat i got hm so late and you oreadi slept.
i dun blame you cuz you slept less than 4hours the prev nite cuz of me.
i wasnt hurt or sad over the stuffs i heard.
but instead i became worried and scared abt the consequences.
its some stuffs i did.
i reallie dunoe.
and i miss you like siaoz now dear.
and boyboy said he wld like to hear me calling him boyboy darling in person.
hahahahax.
okies okies!!
ahhh.
i reallie miss you alot now.
and i feel very selfish now.
cuz i want to wake you up so dat i can chat wif you.
pls pls pls call me once you wake up.
no matter the time.
cuz i wan to hear your voice to feel secure again.
omg.
wads gotten into me!?!?
i promised not to gaga abt boyboy all over my blog.
but i cant help it now..
im feelin so troubled i dunoe why.
maybe cuz of some stuffs i heard?
lucky tml i will be seeing jiejie.
hope we can hav some private time and chit chat.
den i can tell her all those thngs.
jiejie i reallie miss chattin wif you.
though i owaes nv chat wif you online.
i prefer a face to face tok.. ://
ahhh..
sdnly i miss everyone..
i miss boyboy, jiejie, anson, sebas and everyone else..
how i wish all of you are by my side at once.
but nv did this ever happened.
maybe i can erm have a bdae chalet this yr?
or a bdae party?
where i can invite everyone here to be wif me.
okies yes i noe.
im a selfish gurl..
i reallie miss all of you..
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..
i dunoe..
haiz haiz.
i dun wan juz sms or wad..
i wan to see everyone in person..
im a selfish gurl..
i miss all of you beside me joking and laughing wif me.
sdnly i feel like i will nv see all of you again..
got to noe alot of thngs from weilong today.
and weiyan..
if you are readin this..
den yupx..
i finallie believed wad you told me.
hahahax.
weilong told me again today.
except wif more details.
and i asked.
i dun feel hurt or wad cuz REALLIE no more feelings..
juz feel scared..
i dunoe why.. T.T
okies i DO noe why but im not telling here..
i shld juz go and slp now and pass the time rite?
cuz i wan to wait for boyboy to call me..
i hope its not a msg i receive from him cuz he canot call..
haiz haiz..
i dunoe..
im emo-ing and being stupid again.
i miss all of you..
boyboy i miss your everythng..
jiejie i miss chatting wif you..
anson i miss ur jokes and suan-ing..
sebas i miss you laughing wif or at me and juz being there for me everytime i nd you..
everyone i miss the love and concern dat you guys give me.
i feel like meetin every single one of you and give you one big tight hug..
okies only for the gurls.
cuz i noe boyboy will mind.
so for the guys i juz give you a handshake.
hahahahax.
haiz haiz haiz..
i feel so tired now and i noe i ought to go slp.
but i feel so troubled to slp..
hahahahax.
but i dun wan to tok to anione abt it except for boyboy or jiejie or anson..
:///////////////////
my best bf my best cou and my best di.
well anson is my di i suppose.
and best fren if he doesnt mind..
ask him juz dun go eeeeee over it.. -_-
boyboy i dun wan ur ring..
i wan u to be here.
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..
i dun wan to go gaga over boyboy here!!
crap crap crap..
but LIKE I SAID I CANT HELP IT WTH!!
jiejie i juz miss toking to you..
telling you all my troubles and in return hear all ur troubles too..
haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz haiz..
XIN SHI CHONG CHONG AHHHHHHHH!!!!!
i juz hope noone falls victim to ur tricks animore..
i juz hope you will stop lying to those ppl..
the ppl you cheat on are very kelian you noe anot??
stop it okies.
to tink i owaes say you are a hao ren to dunoe how many ppl.
to tink i owaes stand up for your character okies.
you are not a bad person..
but your actions show otherwise.
i noe you are not a bad person..
but why do you do the thngs you do?
stop it okies..
you are hurting alot of ppl likedat.
you are ruining futures belong to many others.
stop it.
you are sooo freaking childish..
you are a gd person.
but cuz of you actions i can say dat i despise you totallie.
to tink dat ur parents trusted you so much.
dun you tink dat you let them down cuz of wad you did?
wake up wake up wake up!!
you are reallie very very very selfish.
i owaes stand up for you esp in frnt of boyboy and anson okies.
and today i noe who you truly are.
ppl were right to ask me to stay away from you.
i noe right from the bottom of my heart dat you are a gd person.
but why do this kind of thngs?
you disappoint me.
im not hurt from ur actions.
cuz i have no more feelings or wadsoever towards you..
im juz disgusted and you juz made me despise you even more..
get out of dat lala land dat you are living in and grow up.
im throwin this line back at you.
smtimes i even tink dat you are a beast im reallie sorry.
respect others..
if you wan them to respect you.
respect their thinkings and choices.
dun force them to go ur way.
and dun tink you are sooo gd dats why ppl like to take advantage of you.
if you are reallie DAT gd you wldnt even mind them havin small gains out of you..
cuz afterall they are frens.
frens DO take advantage of each other i admit.
but dats juz helping isnt it?
and dats wad frens are for.
seriously wake up..
if not i will slap you to wake u up.
im sure i deserve the right to slap you.
and dun forget i have smthng dat i can hold against you.
and if i reallie did dat you can forget abt everythng cuz ur future will seriously be ruined.
you ruined my future..
and if not for ppl arnd me i will nv stand up.
i believe dat you 性本善..
but im sorry i aso tink dat you are a despicable person.
LOWLIFE!!
我打从心里地瞧不起你, 看不起你!!
juz cuz of the thngs you forced me to do i can say dat.
im grateful for all the ppl arnd me dat help me stood up.
its cuz of them dat i had the strength.
all loved ones.
thanks for helping me to recover for him.
cuz of him i wasted almost one and half a year.
dun scold me but i reallie tink if not for him i cld score much much better in my olvls.
although its oreadi not bad now.
even my mum was surprised cuz she said i din study much during dat period.
i spent most of my time moping arnd feeling devastated.
i can now see dat its a stupid thng to do.
its cuz of him i lost almost everythng.
but its aso cuz of him i learnt alot of thngs.
and i wun make the same mistakes again..
thanks everyone for being there for me whenever i nd you.
i promise dear..
boyboy i promise you..
dat i wld nv shed a tear in the movies cuz i got reminded of the hurt i had cuz of him.
cuz they had oreadi healed and even the scars had faded.
i shld stop dawning on the past and feeling sorry for myself.
i swear i din cry cuz i still had feelings.
i cried cuz i got reminded of the hurt i felt.
boyboy i noe you understand.
and thank you boyboy darling for makin me start looking foward to the future again.
hahahahahax.
aso not forgettin anson cuz he let me realised dat i can still fall for another.
hahahahahax.
jiejie im going to tell you everythng tml omg i swear.
cuz there are juz too much thngs dat i wan to tell you and update you on.
i love you jiejie.
hahahahax.
and i love boyboy too~
plus all my frens and family.
对我来说，最重要的是爱情、友情和亲情。。
亲情是不能选的，但他们总会在你身边不离不弃，永远做你的靠山。。
友情是自己选的，而他们是能够互相诉说心事的对象，最重要的那些竟可以收藏一辈子。。
爱情是靠缘分命中注定的，发生的很突然，但只要是碰到对的那个，却能够牵着手一起走完人生大道，一直幸福到老。。
很感谢你们出现在我的生命里，为我的生活增添了不少乐趣。。
现在的我，拥有你们这些亲情、友情和爱情就已经足够了。。
不管怎样，现在的我是很幸福的。。
:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
loves to all..