but i need help.
hello everyone. :)
if anyone who saw an accident happening between tiong bahru road and henderson road at 9.50am on tuesday morning please contact me at jiale92@hotmail.com. we need witnesses to tell us what happened.
thanks so much i cant thank you enough. :)
i would probably get scolded for doing these because they dun want to spread this matter and want to wait till jiejie gets better. but seriously by that time people would have forgotten about it. or otherwise they wun be able to remember the details which might be crucial. yes im taking this matter into my own hands. but seriously i need help.
Friday, February 11, 2011
you post just made me teared T_T *hugs* (L)
thanks adeer. (L) *hugs* love you. sorry never meant to make you cry. you guys make me feel blessed. :')
filled with emotions.
so much venting of emotions these few days.
should do a little proper update.
okay not much happenings though.
ytd went to clara's to do projs.
being with my girls is always happy. :)
though jiejie nv left my mind.
did up our tlaw vid which was tiring yet fun.
all in all thanks girls i love you guys. :)
reached home only to find out that my jiejie got onto the newspaper.
read the news and started crying. how useless.
went to the hospital to see her when i just started my dinner.
went back home and finished my dinner and went to bathe.
while bathing, all i did was to cry.
i kept crying kept praying kept talking to you.
can you hear me from where you are?
it's so faraway but i hope that you can feel that im thinking of you and you would want to get better quickly.
okay i dun wanna cry now.
on a happier note tonight gonna meet mrtay! :)
jiejie i will go visit you tml okay. :)
love you so much!
my precious girl.
there is so much on my mind right now. there is so much i wanna say. so much so that i dunoe where to start.
as stated clearly. this post is about my precious girl. my cousin. my jiejie.
couldnt really see you today. could only see you from outside the room. was afraid to agitate you in any way.
i want you to get better asap. i want your critical period to be over asap. i want you out of the ICU asap.
i could only see your side view. but it's enough. you are still there. still my dearest jiejie.
looking at you, i feel like hugging you so much.
then i would cry so hard and you would hug me back and pat me and tell me it's alright.
you will right?
promise me you will.
we have so many dreams together which are unfulfilled.
please dun leave me alone to fulfill them.
you know how i hate to be alone.
while me and xiaogu (your ahyi) were sitting outside the ICU, we talked about you. how stubborn you are, how bad tempered you are.
and if you were just lying there you confirm would demand to know what happened and would want to get up immediately. we smiled at the knowledge but eventually tears just came to our eyes.
so many people are crying for you.
so many people are worried about you.
alot of my friends are praying for you.
and im sure your own friends are praying for you too.
so dun let us down and recover soon!
did you know when xiaogu told me that your condition worsened my heart literally dropped. and a moment passed before i quickly asked her the details.
every now and then i would think of your face, and this ache would come creeping all over me. which cause me to be unable to think straight and all i can do is cry.
you know how useless i feel? like there is nothing i can do or say to make you feel better again.
i can only keep praying. praying nonstop. to the sky to the stars to the gods. pray to every single gods which i know of.
memories of you and me just keep flowing back. and they are nonstop.
i rmb the grey bear which you love the most.
i rmb that you love hello kitty and i bought you a watch once.
i rmb how you would tell me that the prata shop was famous just cause you think that it's nice.
i rmb how you would go down and tabao food up for me to eat.
i rmb how we went downstairs and agreed to go separate ways to be alone for awhile and clear our minds before meeting each other again and i was worried cause you werent back after awhile.
i rmb you making the milo for me which you added chocs into and i would say that it's the best milo ever.
i rmb us staring into blank space together when we were supposed to study.
i rmb us hugging and crying on each other when we were feeling down.
i rmb us going to rollerblade together and how i would feel amazed at you being able to rollerblade downslope when i had to hold your hands throughout.
i rmb us cycling super fast in ecp with our 'kaceng' CYA aka chia yan an.
i rmb when you and CYA found out that i was trying to matchmake the both of you and the things that you both said to me HAHAHA.
i rmb when you and CYA acted like my big bro and sis while i put my head on the table and acted like a p6 kid though i was alr sec 2 just so that the three of us can see how an ajisen kiddy meal looks like in real life.
i rmb how you and i would act like we are the biggest princesses by using ahma's prettiest and biggest blanket to put on ourselves like we are from the old china dynasties.
i rmb how every morning we would prepare to go to school tgthr and i would go find you after my school to go back to your home tgthr.
i rmb how i would go to your sec sch to find you and you will buy me the specialties from your school's canteen to eat.
i rmb how you would tell ALL your friends that im your real sister and they would believe us and say that we look alike.
i rmb that time when the both of us exchanged our school uniforms and started taking photos like nobody's business.
i rmb the time when we drew up the 'blueprint' of our dream house which included every single floor.
i rmb how you are able to guess what i am thinking.
i rmb how you would try and teach me on your piano.
i rmb how you would lend me to use your laptop.
i rmb how you taught me to write pretty letterings.
i rmb how i would hook your arm everywhere we go.
so many things.
so many memories.
so much more which i did not list out.
so much more that we have yet to create.
you HAVE to be alright.
you just have to.
you haven see me getting a boyfriend and eventually a husband and then many kids.
i haven gone to your wedding and be your maid of honour.
jiejie i love you so much.
you have to stay strong for me.
please.
and dagu and uncle.
and ahma and xiaogu.
and ben lee.
and ahhong and isaac.
and so many more.
please jiejie.
i need news of you getting better. not deteriorating.
i love you. :)
as stated clearly. this post is about my precious girl. my cousin. my jiejie.
couldnt really see you today. could only see you from outside the room. was afraid to agitate you in any way.
i want you to get better asap. i want your critical period to be over asap. i want you out of the ICU asap.
i could only see your side view. but it's enough. you are still there. still my dearest jiejie.
looking at you, i feel like hugging you so much.
then i would cry so hard and you would hug me back and pat me and tell me it's alright.
you will right?
promise me you will.
we have so many dreams together which are unfulfilled.
please dun leave me alone to fulfill them.
you know how i hate to be alone.
while me and xiaogu (your ahyi) were sitting outside the ICU, we talked about you. how stubborn you are, how bad tempered you are.
and if you were just lying there you confirm would demand to know what happened and would want to get up immediately. we smiled at the knowledge but eventually tears just came to our eyes.
so many people are crying for you.
so many people are worried about you.
alot of my friends are praying for you.
and im sure your own friends are praying for you too.
so dun let us down and recover soon!
did you know when xiaogu told me that your condition worsened my heart literally dropped. and a moment passed before i quickly asked her the details.
every now and then i would think of your face, and this ache would come creeping all over me. which cause me to be unable to think straight and all i can do is cry.
you know how useless i feel? like there is nothing i can do or say to make you feel better again.
i can only keep praying. praying nonstop. to the sky to the stars to the gods. pray to every single gods which i know of.
memories of you and me just keep flowing back. and they are nonstop.
i rmb the grey bear which you love the most.
i rmb that you love hello kitty and i bought you a watch once.
i rmb how you would tell me that the prata shop was famous just cause you think that it's nice.
i rmb how you would go down and tabao food up for me to eat.
i rmb how we went downstairs and agreed to go separate ways to be alone for awhile and clear our minds before meeting each other again and i was worried cause you werent back after awhile.
i rmb you making the milo for me which you added chocs into and i would say that it's the best milo ever.
i rmb us staring into blank space together when we were supposed to study.
i rmb us hugging and crying on each other when we were feeling down.
i rmb us going to rollerblade together and how i would feel amazed at you being able to rollerblade downslope when i had to hold your hands throughout.
i rmb us cycling super fast in ecp with our 'kaceng' CYA aka chia yan an.
i rmb when you and CYA found out that i was trying to matchmake the both of you and the things that you both said to me HAHAHA.
i rmb when you and CYA acted like my big bro and sis while i put my head on the table and acted like a p6 kid though i was alr sec 2 just so that the three of us can see how an ajisen kiddy meal looks like in real life.
i rmb how you and i would act like we are the biggest princesses by using ahma's prettiest and biggest blanket to put on ourselves like we are from the old china dynasties.
i rmb how every morning we would prepare to go to school tgthr and i would go find you after my school to go back to your home tgthr.
i rmb how i would go to your sec sch to find you and you will buy me the specialties from your school's canteen to eat.
i rmb how you would tell ALL your friends that im your real sister and they would believe us and say that we look alike.
i rmb that time when the both of us exchanged our school uniforms and started taking photos like nobody's business.
i rmb the time when we drew up the 'blueprint' of our dream house which included every single floor.
i rmb how you are able to guess what i am thinking.
i rmb how you would try and teach me on your piano.
i rmb how you would lend me to use your laptop.
i rmb how you taught me to write pretty letterings.
i rmb how i would hook your arm everywhere we go.
so many things.
so many memories.
so much more which i did not list out.
so much more that we have yet to create.
you HAVE to be alright.
you just have to.
you haven see me getting a boyfriend and eventually a husband and then many kids.
i haven gone to your wedding and be your maid of honour.
jiejie i love you so much.
you have to stay strong for me.
please.
and dagu and uncle.
and ahma and xiaogu.
and ben lee.
and ahhong and isaac.
and so many more.
please jiejie.
i need news of you getting better. not deteriorating.
i love you. :)
Thursday, February 10, 2011
i am so loved.
looking at everyone around me.
asking me to stay strong and jiayou.
and some dun even know whats going on, i feel so loved and blessed.
sorry to cause you guys to worry.
im really grateful for all of you.
and those that gave me so much encouragements.
i believe jiejie will be able to go through this.
and thanks to everything that you guys did.
be it just a short 'i am here for you' or 'stay strong' or 'she'll be alright' or simply just asking 'how is your cousin?' even though she is not exactly related to you guys.
with so many blessings she will be fine. :)
feel so loved that i have so many sweet friends around me.
and even those who dun usually initiate convers came to encourage me. hehe.
my friends are the best yo!
these two days i cried many times.
and all are for you.
but everytime i laugh, i feel a tinge of guiltiness.
guilty of feeling happy when you are in this state.
even though i know you wouldnt want me to feel sad.
and i know you dun want me to feel sad cause of you.
i promise when you open your eyes and see me next,
i will be smiling brightly at you.
i love you!
so freaking much!
hehe. :)
our love will never end okay!
shall kiss you next time! ^^
asking me to stay strong and jiayou.
and some dun even know whats going on, i feel so loved and blessed.
sorry to cause you guys to worry.
im really grateful for all of you.
and those that gave me so much encouragements.
i believe jiejie will be able to go through this.
and thanks to everything that you guys did.
be it just a short 'i am here for you' or 'stay strong' or 'she'll be alright' or simply just asking 'how is your cousin?' even though she is not exactly related to you guys.
with so many blessings she will be fine. :)
feel so loved that i have so many sweet friends around me.
and even those who dun usually initiate convers came to encourage me. hehe.
my friends are the best yo!
these two days i cried many times.
and all are for you.
but everytime i laugh, i feel a tinge of guiltiness.
guilty of feeling happy when you are in this state.
even though i know you wouldnt want me to feel sad.
and i know you dun want me to feel sad cause of you.
i promise when you open your eyes and see me next,
i will be smiling brightly at you.
i love you!
so freaking much!
hehe. :)
our love will never end okay!
shall kiss you next time! ^^
Wednesday, February 09, 2011
my best friend
went to NS this morning. :)
sorry my dear.
it was your best night last night with your girl and i couldnt be happy with you and you had to comfort me who was crying and feeling sad for my cousin.
and i din do anything for you at all before you go in. :/
was really happy for you. :)
i mean it.
you said you would come out with at least two pecs okay.
dun forget!!
take good care of yourself and be careful of any bad people inside.
you never know okay.
if you ever face any hardships remember there is still me who will support you no matter.
thats wad best friends are for.
thanks for running with me on monday night though it was super random.
im having muscle aches now though i din run much.
sorry to make you not run as much too lah. :(
stop saying me.
but yay thanks for the h-two-o treat afterwards. hehe.
i love my best friend okay. :)
please be more of a man than a boy when you come out two weeks later. HAHAHA
sorry my dear.
it was your best night last night with your girl and i couldnt be happy with you and you had to comfort me who was crying and feeling sad for my cousin.
and i din do anything for you at all before you go in. :/
was really happy for you. :)
i mean it.
you said you would come out with at least two pecs okay.
dun forget!!
take good care of yourself and be careful of any bad people inside.
you never know okay.
if you ever face any hardships remember there is still me who will support you no matter.
thats wad best friends are for.
thanks for running with me on monday night though it was super random.
im having muscle aches now though i din run much.
sorry to make you not run as much too lah. :(
stop saying me.
but yay thanks for the h-two-o treat afterwards. hehe.
i love my best friend okay. :)
please be more of a man than a boy when you come out two weeks later. HAHAHA
my role model.
jiejie,
you know that i love you right?
i know that you love me.
miss you calling me 'jaelurp queen'
you were the one who gave me this 'jaelurp' name. :)
have always been closer than sisters since young.
i would tell you everything,
and you would tell me everything.
you took my first french kiss away.
HAHAHA how retarded were we,
playing the prince and princess games.
we would always be the 'main leads' cause we are the oldest,
not counting bernard korkor of course.
our dream house where everyone would stay together,
i din forget.
i still wanna be your maid of honour on your wedding.
i still wanna go crazy with you and dance about in your room while blasting music.
i still wanna hear all your secrets.
i still wanna laugh at all the weird people you told me about with you.
i still wanna go shopping with you, go around eating good food with you.
i still want you to make your special milo just for me.
i still want you to buy breakfast for me while im still sleeping.
you have always acted like my real big sister,
and i have always treated you like one.
you are my jiejie.
forever my jiejie.
you have to survive these three days first.
promise me you will.
the doc says it's too early to say if there are going to be any side effects.
im afraid.
i want you to be just like before.
i wanted to hold your hand so much.
i wanted to hold your face so much.
i wanted to pat your head and tell you it's alright.
i wanted to let you know that im here for you.
but i can only get shocked at how you look like now.
you look so weak, so fragile.
like if i touch you anywhere, it's gonna hurt so bad.
i can only look at you.
and hope that you will be alright.
i feel so useless.
there is nothing i can do.
when i try and imagine the pain you felt when you got hit,
it hurts so so so much.
when i look at you and i realised that i couldnt recognize you,
my heart broke.
and i couldnt cry in front of you.
i dun wanna affect you.
they wanted you to stay unconscious so you wun be agitated.
so i couldnt say a word to you, for fear of waking you up.
i wanted to say i love you, but when i saw you, i went dumbfounded.
what can i do or say to make you feel better.
i have no idea.
someone so close to me, so impt to me.
and yet there is nothing i can do to help.
when i realised that even though your breathing is hard through all those tubes,
i can still recognize it.
it gave me a little hope.
that you are still alive.
that you are still you.
i closed my eyes,
thinking back about how it still sounds the same when i was sleeping over at your house,
when i couldnt fall aslp and stayed awake while listening to you breathing beside me until i did.
looking at your half shaven head,
knowing that for the time being you wun be able to say a word,
and that you wun be able to walk,
i dunoe how you will feel or wad you will do.
you are such an optimistic and cheerful person.
you will be alright right?
好人不是有好报吗？
this is just a test for you.
you must be strong enough to go through this okay.
i woke up real early this morning, and i thought of you.
tried to go back to sleep.
and everytime i wake up i think of you.
you stayed on my mind all the time.
sleeping doesnt help.
it doesnt.
drifted these two years.
i wish i hung out with you more now.
miss you so much now.
we just said that we would catch up with each other on cny eve din we?
dun break your word okay.
i love you so much.
more than i thought.
i truly feel that now.
you are so impt to me.
please god.
please let her be okay.
jiejie i feel so helpless now.
wad should i do?
wad can i do?
i would take the pain for you.
i just want you to be alright again.
you have always taken care of me.
now it's my turn.
though i dun really know exactly how to.
but i will try my best.
i love you.
;forever your jaelurp queen.
you know that i love you right?
i know that you love me.
miss you calling me 'jaelurp queen'
you were the one who gave me this 'jaelurp' name. :)
have always been closer than sisters since young.
i would tell you everything,
and you would tell me everything.
you took my first french kiss away.
HAHAHA how retarded were we,
playing the prince and princess games.
we would always be the 'main leads' cause we are the oldest,
not counting bernard korkor of course.
our dream house where everyone would stay together,
i din forget.
i still wanna be your maid of honour on your wedding.
i still wanna go crazy with you and dance about in your room while blasting music.
i still wanna hear all your secrets.
i still wanna laugh at all the weird people you told me about with you.
i still wanna go shopping with you, go around eating good food with you.
i still want you to make your special milo just for me.
i still want you to buy breakfast for me while im still sleeping.
you have always acted like my real big sister,
and i have always treated you like one.
you are my jiejie.
forever my jiejie.
you have to survive these three days first.
promise me you will.
the doc says it's too early to say if there are going to be any side effects.
im afraid.
i want you to be just like before.
i wanted to hold your hand so much.
i wanted to hold your face so much.
i wanted to pat your head and tell you it's alright.
i wanted to let you know that im here for you.
but i can only get shocked at how you look like now.
you look so weak, so fragile.
like if i touch you anywhere, it's gonna hurt so bad.
i can only look at you.
and hope that you will be alright.
i feel so useless.
there is nothing i can do.
when i try and imagine the pain you felt when you got hit,
it hurts so so so much.
when i look at you and i realised that i couldnt recognize you,
my heart broke.
and i couldnt cry in front of you.
i dun wanna affect you.
they wanted you to stay unconscious so you wun be agitated.
so i couldnt say a word to you, for fear of waking you up.
i wanted to say i love you, but when i saw you, i went dumbfounded.
what can i do or say to make you feel better.
i have no idea.
someone so close to me, so impt to me.
and yet there is nothing i can do to help.
when i realised that even though your breathing is hard through all those tubes,
i can still recognize it.
it gave me a little hope.
that you are still alive.
that you are still you.
i closed my eyes,
thinking back about how it still sounds the same when i was sleeping over at your house,
when i couldnt fall aslp and stayed awake while listening to you breathing beside me until i did.
looking at your half shaven head,
knowing that for the time being you wun be able to say a word,
and that you wun be able to walk,
i dunoe how you will feel or wad you will do.
you are such an optimistic and cheerful person.
you will be alright right?
好人不是有好报吗？
this is just a test for you.
you must be strong enough to go through this okay.
i woke up real early this morning, and i thought of you.
tried to go back to sleep.
and everytime i wake up i think of you.
you stayed on my mind all the time.
sleeping doesnt help.
it doesnt.
drifted these two years.
i wish i hung out with you more now.
miss you so much now.
we just said that we would catch up with each other on cny eve din we?
dun break your word okay.
i love you so much.
more than i thought.
i truly feel that now.
you are so impt to me.
please god.
please let her be okay.
jiejie i feel so helpless now.
wad should i do?
wad can i do?
i would take the pain for you.
i just want you to be alright again.
you have always taken care of me.
now it's my turn.
though i dun really know exactly how to.
but i will try my best.
i love you.
;forever your jaelurp queen.
Tuesday, February 08, 2011
PLEASE PRAY THAT SHE'S ALRIGHT.
got news on my way home that jiejie (my closest cousin) got into a car accident and is unconscious. din think that it was that serious at that time.
after i got home, asked mum about her condition and she said it was quite serious. and she had a head operation and is currently in ICU. tear glands started to feel wide and i just went back to my room and started sobbing on my bed.
dad came in to our room where jiamin and i were and started talking about being careful on the roads so that we wun let him or mum worry and not to look at our phones while crossing the road.
and he saw my tears and asked if i knew about the incident and i nodded and started crying and when he hugged me i just cried harder.
i just feel so worried. it's serious. really serious. :/ not just any mini car accident. and i swear i never thought that this would happen to anyone close to me. i've always thought that it happened to others others others.
please everyone, please be careful while on the roads okay. dun let anyone who care get worried. if you cant think of anyone who cares, rmb that i do. i truly do.
jiejie believes in god jesus. so he will make sure she is alright right?
it's always at this kind of time that i hate that im a free thinker. i dunoe who to pray to. need a spiritual being to calm me down and make me feel better now. or does it mean i can pray to every god right now? :(
curbing my sobs now. it's useless for me to cry here now. :( sorry jie it must have hurt so much when you got hit. sorry for not hanging out with you more. i love you. be alright for all of us here who love you so much.
going to visit her later.
hope she would be out of the ICU by then. dad says if not we cant really see her. :/
老天爷，
我从小的时候总是有事时才拜托您，
但是这次您一定要保佑她。
我会给您很多亲亲的。
求求您。
after i got home, asked mum about her condition and she said it was quite serious. and she had a head operation and is currently in ICU. tear glands started to feel wide and i just went back to my room and started sobbing on my bed.
dad came in to our room where jiamin and i were and started talking about being careful on the roads so that we wun let him or mum worry and not to look at our phones while crossing the road.
and he saw my tears and asked if i knew about the incident and i nodded and started crying and when he hugged me i just cried harder.
i just feel so worried. it's serious. really serious. :/ not just any mini car accident. and i swear i never thought that this would happen to anyone close to me. i've always thought that it happened to others others others.
please everyone, please be careful while on the roads okay. dun let anyone who care get worried. if you cant think of anyone who cares, rmb that i do. i truly do.
jiejie believes in god jesus. so he will make sure she is alright right?
it's always at this kind of time that i hate that im a free thinker. i dunoe who to pray to. need a spiritual being to calm me down and make me feel better now. or does it mean i can pray to every god right now? :(
curbing my sobs now. it's useless for me to cry here now. :( sorry jie it must have hurt so much when you got hit. sorry for not hanging out with you more. i love you. be alright for all of us here who love you so much.
going to visit her later.
hope she would be out of the ICU by then. dad says if not we cant really see her. :/
老天爷，
我从小的时候总是有事时才拜托您，
但是这次您一定要保佑她。
我会给您很多亲亲的。
求求您。
Monday, February 07, 2011
PMG THATS MY FAV BISCUIT TOOOOO. I JUST FINISHED TWO BOTTLES OF IT XDXD SO YUMMYYYYYYY
:( my house only got one container of it so sad. i shall emo until i learn how to bake it. when i learn how i bake for you okay HAHAHA
eventful day.
today is a SUPER eventful day~
okay first up, waking up bright and early for SPM presentation.
was super nervous before and during the presentation. and during the Q&A session after our presentation or in fact, every group's presentation, both tutors were being bitches. :/ argh kept shooting nonstop. we were literally breaking down wts. -_- sucks to be us.
after the presentation, we wanted to go beauty world for lunch and timah shopping centre to print our TDM report. and at the bus stop, we saw this girl who fainted. the four of us (me ahyi clara and hyrah) went over to see if we could help. and esp ahyi who is a first aider.
stayed and helped wadever we can, carrying chairs for her to lie down, calling her bf, talking to the security guards and stayed there till her bf arrived and then the paramedics and telling the medics wad happened and what we saw blahh blahh until she was finally sent to the hospital under accompany of a friend.
her bf seems nice though. he came over and asked our course and year and said we would be hearing from him soon cause he wanna give us something in return for our help. O.O
but we wonder how he is going to find us since he doesnt know our class/names and only know our course, school, year, and faces. hahahaha.
after which, we bused to beauty world and ate at macs and went to print our report and golf reflections.
while waiting for a cab to go back to school, clara found out that she put the wrong file into her thumbdrive and our SPM report was printed instead of our TDM report, therefore wasting 20bucks to print the former. -_-
went back to print all over again and thanks to the nice uncle we printed the second doc for a cheaper price. :):)
went to hail a cab and then there was HUMONGOUS jam cause of this tow truck vehicle which was blocking the whole traffic. :/
i know you belong to the construction area but it doesnt mean you can hold up the whole traffic. :( esp when the roads there are like SUPER DUPER squeezy. :(
finally the road cleared up abit and we finally got into the cab and went back to school.
AND this car sdnly turned out of SIM and our cab almost knocked onto it. -_- HELLO!?!? when you turn into a main road you dun turn into the middle lane straight okayyy. you wanna kill us all!? T.T
poor us arrived at school safely where me and clara got out to hand up the stuffs while ahyi and hyrah head home for the day. me and clara kept going out of the wrong floors in the lift while trying to get to the 9th floor and then back down to the 1st floor. T.T
judging by the looks of today, it's a big fortune to scrape through it and to be safe right now at home to type out all these happenings to you guys here who are reading this. :)
btw, why all the bad things happened today!? though in the second fainting event we were being kind and helpful people but it isnt exactly nice when someone faints! :/ hope it means that all the good things are going to happen next!!!! /prayshard
okay btw, there are one iphone 3GS and three iphone 4 in my house right now. O.O ohhhh i feel so rich kekeke.
okay myretarded cute mum just finished heating the bakkwas my sis received as bonus from her bakkwa seller job and she waved the plate of hot bakkwas at me and was like 'hmmm bakkwas~' at me. HAHAHA.
another btw, this is CURRENTLY MY FAVOURITE BISCUITS HEHEHE but there wun be anymore of these after i finish this container and i would have to wait for next year to eat it again. :( okay i should learn how to bake it WOOHOO! (ignore my irritating big small eyes. -_-)
looking forward to friday night. hehe. ^^
okay first up, waking up bright and early for SPM presentation.
was super nervous before and during the presentation. and during the Q&A session after our presentation or in fact, every group's presentation, both tutors were being bitches. :/ argh kept shooting nonstop. we were literally breaking down wts. -_- sucks to be us.
after the presentation, we wanted to go beauty world for lunch and timah shopping centre to print our TDM report. and at the bus stop, we saw this girl who fainted. the four of us (me ahyi clara and hyrah) went over to see if we could help. and esp ahyi who is a first aider.
stayed and helped wadever we can, carrying chairs for her to lie down, calling her bf, talking to the security guards and stayed there till her bf arrived and then the paramedics and telling the medics wad happened and what we saw blahh blahh until she was finally sent to the hospital under accompany of a friend.
her bf seems nice though. he came over and asked our course and year and said we would be hearing from him soon cause he wanna give us something in return for our help. O.O
but we wonder how he is going to find us since he doesnt know our class/names and only know our course, school, year, and faces. hahahaha.
after which, we bused to beauty world and ate at macs and went to print our report and golf reflections.
while waiting for a cab to go back to school, clara found out that she put the wrong file into her thumbdrive and our SPM report was printed instead of our TDM report, therefore wasting 20bucks to print the former. -_-
went back to print all over again and thanks to the nice uncle we printed the second doc for a cheaper price. :):)
went to hail a cab and then there was HUMONGOUS jam cause of this tow truck vehicle which was blocking the whole traffic. :/
i know you belong to the construction area but it doesnt mean you can hold up the whole traffic. :( esp when the roads there are like SUPER DUPER squeezy. :(
finally the road cleared up abit and we finally got into the cab and went back to school.
AND this car sdnly turned out of SIM and our cab almost knocked onto it. -_- HELLO!?!? when you turn into a main road you dun turn into the middle lane straight okayyy. you wanna kill us all!? T.T
poor us arrived at school safely where me and clara got out to hand up the stuffs while ahyi and hyrah head home for the day. me and clara kept going out of the wrong floors in the lift while trying to get to the 9th floor and then back down to the 1st floor. T.T
judging by the looks of today, it's a big fortune to scrape through it and to be safe right now at home to type out all these happenings to you guys here who are reading this. :)
btw, why all the bad things happened today!? though in the second fainting event we were being kind and helpful people but it isnt exactly nice when someone faints! :/ hope it means that all the good things are going to happen next!!!! /prayshard
okay btw, there are one iphone 3GS and three iphone 4 in my house right now. O.O ohhhh i feel so rich kekeke.
okay my
another btw, this is CURRENTLY MY FAVOURITE BISCUITS HEHEHE but there wun be anymore of these after i finish this container and i would have to wait for next year to eat it again. :( okay i should learn how to bake it WOOHOO! (ignore my irritating big small eyes. -_-)
looking forward to friday night. hehe. ^^
Sunday, February 06, 2011
brimming with happiness.
[EDITED]
/smiles widely and beams at everyone even though they are staring back while rolling their eyes at my ugly face
OHH BTW one day my sis saw me texting sebas whose name on my contact list is 'sebastian loo' and she really tot sebas's surname is 'loo' when it is actually 'liu' HAHAHAHAHA /laughs like crazy
/smiles widely and beams at everyone even though they are staring back while rolling their eyes at my ugly face
AS OBVIOUS AS IT SEEMS, i'm feeling happy. :)
met up with someone impt to me. okay it's sebastian loo liu yu wei merlion~ :D:D
asked him to go around with me to shop for a bag! ^^
after my sis spoiled mine which i bought in thailand. :( okay not spoiled, but she tore it. not much diff. :(
ate at this watami jap restaurant in ion and had the set lunch for two and we chose the $49 one. i think we are crazy. super lots of food. all cause of sebastian loo. he said he was super hungry. and in the end the both of us were full even BEFORE the last two dishes arrived on the table. and in the end we just paid the bill and ran off. hahahaha. okay here are some pics we i took while we were waiting for seats~
reluctant sucker. :(
idiot pointing middle finger which is not obv. -_- sebastian loo you suck.
OHH BTW one day my sis saw me texting sebas whose name on my contact list is 'sebastian loo' and she really tot sebas's surname is 'loo' when it is actually 'liu' HAHAHAHAHA /laughs like crazy
went from ion to plaza sing to 313 to centrepoint to look for my bag and his underwear and hp spare batt for his NS life. HAHAHA. it's always fun to be with my bestf kekeke.
eventually i bought my bag at 313 woohoo happy girl i am. :D and he bought his underwear at centrepoint. hahahaha i feel like a perv walking around with him in the underwear departments. and the saleswoman kept shooting me weird glances. :( i was just being what a bestf should do - being there for my bestf. :(
and i was feeling oh-so-bored while he was looking around for his underwear and he said this is how he feels when i was looking around for my bag. :( just cause im not sam. WHAT A LOUSY BESTF HUH!? hahahahaha.
went to cityhall citylink mall cause he wanted to buy something to prepare for his valentines gift to someone. hahahaha. valentines is supposed to be international friends day toooo. i want a present too. :(
took train tgthr while he went to meet his sec sch clique for dinner and he asked me if i wanna join him and gang for dinner. but it will be so weird. HAHAHA and i doubt anyone from my sec sch would think that we are still in contact. :/
anyway went home for awhile and went to deposit my angbao money hoho. went out again to meet mrtay and peihan and went over to peihan's hse to playy. the rest came and we played circle of death, dai dee, monopoly deal etc. hahahaha. and i was the only one drinking soft drink when playing circle of death keke thanks everyone~
wad was shocking was peihan's family sdnly coming home when we thought that they would only be back the next day. hahahaha. but his mum was nice and hospitable keke. ^^
thanks for mrtay for sending me and it's alright though you din send me to my doorstep. :)
it was kinda upsetting, what you said on the bus. but at least you realised it and apologised. :)
that text you sent, made me feel really happy too. ^^
take good care of yourself and stop being sick!.
btw here is a cute picture of me, ortao, jiamin and weilong. order is as shown below. HAHAHA.
tao is older than me by one year, i am older than weilong than one year, and long is older than ahminah by one year.
hard to tell eh. it looks like me and tao same age/im older cause im taller in the picture and ahminah is like many years younger than us. she is so small. -_- but WE ARE CUTE (though i am the cutest HEHE)
YAYY I LOVE CHILDHOOD PHOTOS (L)
that text you sent, made me feel really happy too. ^^
take good care of yourself and stop being sick!.
btw here is a cute picture of me, ortao, jiamin and weilong. order is as shown below. HAHAHA.
tao is older than me by one year, i am older than weilong than one year, and long is older than ahminah by one year.
hard to tell eh. it looks like me and tao same age/im older cause im taller in the picture and ahminah is like many years younger than us. she is so small. -_- but WE ARE CUTE (though i am the cutest HEHE)
YAYY I LOVE CHILDHOOD PHOTOS (L)
Saturday, February 05, 2011
you have the magic
to make me feel happy again even though i was moody/unhappy/angry in the first place. :)
smile much, laugh lots, be happy. :)
thanks for helping me to accomplish this goal.
let's continue this as long as possible.
Friday, February 04, 2011
HAPPY CNY! :)
HELLO EVERYONE HAPPY LUNAR NEW YEAR!!
everyone must be busy going around for cny visiting right!? SO AM I! :D:D
but seriously seriously seriously, there is no cny feel/mood at all this year. :( even at my ahma house. :( everyone is like lazing around doing nothing. and judging my twitter and friends who texted me, they feel the same. :(
usually my ahma house will be like super crowded up till the point when i cant even find a seat to sit and i can only sit on the ground. but there will be like alot of festive feel. but this year. :(:( sadly.
when i reached, everyone was like as per normal, as in usual gathering and not like it is a special occasion. and usually the aunties will give you angbaos almost immediately and laugh and smile widely but this year they took their own sweet time to give it like it is nothing. :(
sadder still, most of the people went off/home at like what 6plus 7plus. :( WHERE GOT NEW YEAR FEEL!?!?
in the past, the uncles will like go up to 8th floor to play mahjong. then the kids (us cousins, nieces, nephews) and the remaining uncles and aunties will go up to 4th floor to play blackjack and had to use the big glass table and we still cant fit at the table and had to sit at the side or even stand. and we will be playing till like 1plus in the morning before leaving unwillingly.
this year, only like some of us played. :( the number of people was so little that a mahjong table is enough. and we barely played till 11plus. :/
:( i miss the cny feel.
haiz cny will be over before i even have a tinge of cny feel. okay at least i got angbaos to cheer me up. okay still not cheered up. :( dun even have mood to count my angbao money. argh. where is the happy cny mood!?
Thursday, February 03, 2011
CNY EVE 除夕
hello technically it's alr 新年初一 but just gonna update about wad happened in the day woohoo yay hey!
anyway wanted to wake up early for a run but i was too tired though i slept for 7 hours alr due to only having 3 hours of slp the prev night. :(
fell back aslp and woke up with a start cause im supposed to meet mrtay at chinatown at 1pm and i still have to pass clara her bday present which i owed since aug. hahahaha.
anyway went to pass her the present but she was still slping so passed it to her parents who were standing at the door when i reached. hahahaha. just realised i forgot to wish them 新年快乐 -_- totally not in cny mood seriously. i even forgot that it's cny. -_-
then went over to chinatown and met mrtay and friends. went to look for the karaoke place and had our lunch near there before going up to sing song~ super cheap 10bucks per person OMGGGGG. hahahahaha.
i sang alot. -_- despite me choosing only a few songs throughout the whole session. cause i know most of the songs they chose and they kept giving me the mic. i think it's pretty obv that i feel super paiseh to sing judging by the volume of my voice and i stopped singing once noone sang. hahahaha.
but anyway it's really a cheap place PLUS there are free flow of drinks and supposedly bird's nest which they dun provide today. i think most probably cause it's cny eve. hahahaha.
after the k session mrtay sent me to braddell and i went to ahma house! was the first to reach there and watched some tv while chatting with 小姑. started to eat all the cny goodies hehehe imma happy girl! :D
then the rest of my family came and jiejie and 大姑 came and we ate our reunion dinner~
okay not exactly reunion dinner. just the usual simple fare with noodles, chicken and some veg which ahma cooks. hahahaha. so used to it alr. if one day ahma doesnt cook that i think i will be real surprised. hahahaha.
OHHH and i received angbaos tooo! hehehe. four angbaos alr! ohh and adding onto mum's it's five angbaos now! ^^ happy girl i am!
HERE IS A PIC OF ME AND MY ANGBAOS!! ^^ wanna wish everyone a happy lunar new year here and hope everyone HUAT ah and those studying wun be so stressed and their results will get flying rainbows okayyy! ^^
yayyy be more energetic after seeing my photo!! ^^ okay may everyone have a great day GOODBYE! (L)
anyway wanted to wake up early for a run but i was too tired though i slept for 7 hours alr due to only having 3 hours of slp the prev night. :(
fell back aslp and woke up with a start cause im supposed to meet mrtay at chinatown at 1pm and i still have to pass clara her bday present which i owed since aug. hahahaha.
anyway went to pass her the present but she was still slping so passed it to her parents who were standing at the door when i reached. hahahaha. just realised i forgot to wish them 新年快乐 -_- totally not in cny mood seriously. i even forgot that it's cny. -_-
then went over to chinatown and met mrtay and friends. went to look for the karaoke place and had our lunch near there before going up to sing song~ super cheap 10bucks per person OMGGGGG. hahahahaha.
i sang alot. -_- despite me choosing only a few songs throughout the whole session. cause i know most of the songs they chose and they kept giving me the mic. i think it's pretty obv that i feel super paiseh to sing judging by the volume of my voice and i stopped singing once noone sang. hahahaha.
but anyway it's really a cheap place PLUS there are free flow of drinks and supposedly bird's nest which they dun provide today. i think most probably cause it's cny eve. hahahaha.
after the k session mrtay sent me to braddell and i went to ahma house! was the first to reach there and watched some tv while chatting with 小姑. started to eat all the cny goodies hehehe imma happy girl! :D
then the rest of my family came and jiejie and 大姑 came and we ate our reunion dinner~
okay not exactly reunion dinner. just the usual simple fare with noodles, chicken and some veg which ahma cooks. hahahaha. so used to it alr. if one day ahma doesnt cook that i think i will be real surprised. hahahaha.
OHHH and i received angbaos tooo! hehehe. four angbaos alr! ohh and adding onto mum's it's five angbaos now! ^^ happy girl i am!
HERE IS A PIC OF ME AND MY ANGBAOS!! ^^ wanna wish everyone a happy lunar new year here and hope everyone HUAT ah and those studying wun be so stressed and their results will get flying rainbows okayyy! ^^
yayyy be more energetic after seeing my photo!! ^^ okay may everyone have a great day GOODBYE! (L)
Wednesday, February 02, 2011
dropped by here to share a LINK with everyone which mrtay shared with me this morning/afternoon. :):)
okay it is an article about maintaining a healthy relationship and it sets me thinking. and one particular line enlightened me:
this is so true. i kept thinking that if my bf is the one, he should have telepathy with me and know that what i am thinking/feeling without me saying anything. HAHAHA.
this thinking is retarded because we are not edward cullens, which in the other words means that we are not mind readers. hahahaha.
was telling mrtay that i feel this way and he told me he does too which is like WAHHH O.O cause all along i always thought that i am the only weird one with this mindset. hahahaha! hmmm just to set you thinking and here are some pennies for your thoughts. /sprinkles many pennies everywhere
soooooo somebody wants to be more honest alr. kekeke.
okayy anywayy nowadays have been thinking alot more on life. i have no idea why. reflecting so much on life. and zhengjie also shared with me alot of his life's perspectives which he only wants me to think more with different points of view and not agree with him. :)
i like the way he tells me that he dun want me to agree with him and he only wants to set me thinking. SOMETIMES im really that kind who would just agree and forgo my own set of thinkings. :(
but eventually everyone thinks differently and it is not possible for one to agree entirely with the other. you can only show the other party your perspectives and it will be up to him/her to grasp the meaning within.
okayyy now i should get to slp soon there are too many things for me to do tml hahahaha. nights everyone. :)
okay it is an article about maintaining a healthy relationship and it sets me thinking. and one particular line enlightened me:
Relationships fail when individuals hold the belief that: if he/she loves me, he/she should know what to do or what to say. I don’t have to tell him/her what I’m feeling or thinking.
this is so true. i kept thinking that if my bf is the one, he should have telepathy with me and know that what i am thinking/feeling without me saying anything. HAHAHA.
this thinking is retarded because we are not edward cullens, which in the other words means that we are not mind readers. hahahaha.
was telling mrtay that i feel this way and he told me he does too which is like WAHHH O.O cause all along i always thought that i am the only weird one with this mindset. hahahaha! hmmm just to set you thinking and here are some pennies for your thoughts. /sprinkles many pennies everywhere
soooooo somebody wants to be more honest alr. kekeke.
okayy anywayy nowadays have been thinking alot more on life. i have no idea why. reflecting so much on life. and zhengjie also shared with me alot of his life's perspectives which he only wants me to think more with different points of view and not agree with him. :)
i like the way he tells me that he dun want me to agree with him and he only wants to set me thinking. SOMETIMES im really that kind who would just agree and forgo my own set of thinkings. :(
but eventually everyone thinks differently and it is not possible for one to agree entirely with the other. you can only show the other party your perspectives and it will be up to him/her to grasp the meaning within.
okayyy now i should get to slp soon there are too many things for me to do tml hahahaha. nights everyone. :)
Tuesday, February 01, 2011
im a studious kid.
okay the above line is a lie. HAHAHAHA.
im in tlaw lecture nowwww. and im totally not listening. :(:( i cant help it. i already dun understand what he is talking about since i was late for like about half an hour?
and he din include this in our tlaw book and we had to use our laptop to see the lecture and SOOOOO im greatly distracted. :(
THIS IS NOT MY FAULT!! okay it is. -_- but okay at least i showed my face here hehehe.
anywayyyyy. had school ytd and afterwards met keith and corrine at the bus stop to wait for mervyn to come and fetch us in cab kekeke. crossed the overhead bridge and he came! quickly got into the cab and off we go to NSRCC~
it's the BA SOCIETY CHALET aka MAX'S BIRTHDAY CHALET!!!!! :D:D
with the theme of SECONDARY SCHOOL! thereforeeeeee we must wear sec sch uniform!
sadly my mum refused to dig out mine for me. so i dun have any. but keh brought her sec sch skirt for me hehehehe. so i just anyhow wore a blouse and keh's HIGH WAIST skirt. hahahaha.super high waist.
it was fun. mahjong-ing, complaining that i wanna eat, trying to help merv with the cooking but in the end nothing for me to do, jump about, camwhoring. kekeke. all of us were crazy kids. simply love the night. esp with darren, mervyn and leon jordan's BA SOCIETY SONG. HAHAHAHA ridiculous ttm. but it was super fun.
lots of camwhores and going crazy around. kekeke. and eventually we had a toast. with this white wine that merv bought. it is really sweet and okay there is alcoholic taste but the sweetness covers most of it. heh heh.
saying 'YAMMMM SEEEEENNNNGGGGGG!' can really make you pant afterwards. shouting at the top of our lungs nonstop. HAHAHA. breathless~
okay lazy to get photos from fb so :):) i should start including pictures in my posts but hmmm wait till i get a new cam HAHAHAHA.
okay sooooooo, left with lots of people to catch the last shuttle bus. originally wanted to catch the second last one but we missed it after mixing up the timings. :( home home home. reached home late and had to help mum to pay the hdb bills stuffs.
im feeling hungry nowwwww. :( i want to eat eat eat.
btwwww, my twitter making me laugh like siao now. me and ade and gwy. HAHAHA. adeer is making me laugh like crazy seriously HAHAHA we are so retarded but kitty and reindeer is forever the <3!! ^^ just like prawn and octopus. <3 HAHAHAHA
anywayyy, good luck to mrtay for your test today even though i am not sure whether you had it already anot. guess that you studied till quite late last night. :( take good care of yourself! :):)
the content and timing of the msg was so cute and sweet. :)
im in tlaw lecture nowwww. and im totally not listening. :(:( i cant help it. i already dun understand what he is talking about since i was late for like about half an hour?
and he din include this in our tlaw book and we had to use our laptop to see the lecture and SOOOOO im greatly distracted. :(
THIS IS NOT MY FAULT!! okay it is. -_- but okay at least i showed my face here hehehe.
anywayyyyy. had school ytd and afterwards met keith and corrine at the bus stop to wait for mervyn to come and fetch us in cab kekeke. crossed the overhead bridge and he came! quickly got into the cab and off we go to NSRCC~
it's the BA SOCIETY CHALET aka MAX'S BIRTHDAY CHALET!!!!! :D:D
with the theme of SECONDARY SCHOOL! thereforeeeeee we must wear sec sch uniform!
sadly my mum refused to dig out mine for me. so i dun have any. but keh brought her sec sch skirt for me hehehehe. so i just anyhow wore a blouse and keh's HIGH WAIST skirt. hahahaha.super high waist.
it was fun. mahjong-ing, complaining that i wanna eat, trying to help merv with the cooking but in the end nothing for me to do, jump about, camwhoring. kekeke. all of us were crazy kids. simply love the night. esp with darren, mervyn and leon jordan's BA SOCIETY SONG. HAHAHAHA ridiculous ttm. but it was super fun.
lots of camwhores and going crazy around. kekeke. and eventually we had a toast. with this white wine that merv bought. it is really sweet and okay there is alcoholic taste but the sweetness covers most of it. heh heh.
saying 'YAMMMM SEEEEENNNNGGGGGG!' can really make you pant afterwards. shouting at the top of our lungs nonstop. HAHAHA. breathless~
okay lazy to get photos from fb so :):) i should start including pictures in my posts but hmmm wait till i get a new cam HAHAHAHA.
okay sooooooo, left with lots of people to catch the last shuttle bus. originally wanted to catch the second last one but we missed it after mixing up the timings. :( home home home. reached home late and had to help mum to pay the hdb bills stuffs.
im feeling hungry nowwwww. :( i want to eat eat eat.
btwwww, my twitter making me laugh like siao now. me and ade and gwy. HAHAHA. adeer is making me laugh like crazy seriously HAHAHA we are so retarded but kitty and reindeer is forever the <3!! ^^ just like prawn and octopus. <3 HAHAHAHA
anywayyy, good luck to mrtay for your test today even though i am not sure whether you had it already anot. guess that you studied till quite late last night. :( take good care of yourself! :):)
the content and timing of the msg was so cute and sweet. :)
Sunday, January 30, 2011
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MRTAY!
soooooo it's mr tay yin ji's birthday today anddddd
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BELOVED MR TAYYYY! ^^
i know you are studying hard now so jiayouuu! :)
okayyy so went to cine suki sushi to meet mr tay. i was earlier (though he reached town first but had an errand to run) and had to stand in the queue alone. T.T and i was the only one standing outside waiting for a seat. :( luckily soon after some ppl came and stood behind me kekeke.
mr tay reached just when a table got cleared. lucky him dun have to wait for long. birthday boy 就是有这种魔力. :( make me look forward to my birthdayyyy. BUT NOOOO I DUN WANT TO TURN 19 JUST YETTT! :(
anyway happy him ate lots of food ah. i ate quite a bit too. :( but felt full really fast. honghong's fault. :/ hope i dun grow fat. need to go run soon.
played monopoly deal after i felt full and he was still eating HAHA PIG!! and he kept winning. :( haiz. the power of being a birthday boy. HAHAHA.
and while playing, i accidentally spilled a cup of water. T.T and i was holding onto the cup which was still half full and when i was trying to put it on the table i spilled it over myself again. :(:( retarded me. and i was quite wet. but luckily it was only the bottom half that was wet.
the waiter quickly came to clean it up for me while i was trying to dry myself with serviettes. felt super dumb and clumsy. T.T throw face to the max thank you very much. :(
anywayy home soon after cause he still had his test to study for and i still have work to do. :(
and last but not least, it is 最 BRAVE 的 MAX'S BIRTHDAYY TOOOOO! HAHAHAHA
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE BRAVEST MAXXXXX!! :D:D:D
looking back today, though i was rather moody cause of my mood swing, it was a rather happy day. :) thank you!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BELOVED MR TAYYYY! ^^
i know you are studying hard now so jiayouuu! :)
okayyy so went to cine suki sushi to meet mr tay. i was earlier (though he reached town first but had an errand to run) and had to stand in the queue alone. T.T and i was the only one standing outside waiting for a seat. :( luckily soon after some ppl came and stood behind me kekeke.
mr tay reached just when a table got cleared. lucky him dun have to wait for long. birthday boy 就是有这种魔力. :( make me look forward to my birthdayyyy. BUT NOOOO I DUN WANT TO TURN 19 JUST YETTT! :(
anyway happy him ate lots of food ah. i ate quite a bit too. :( but felt full really fast. honghong's fault. :/ hope i dun grow fat. need to go run soon.
played monopoly deal after i felt full and he was still eating HAHA PIG!! and he kept winning. :( haiz. the power of being a birthday boy. HAHAHA.
and while playing, i accidentally spilled a cup of water. T.T and i was holding onto the cup which was still half full and when i was trying to put it on the table i spilled it over myself again. :(:( retarded me. and i was quite wet. but luckily it was only the bottom half that was wet.
the waiter quickly came to clean it up for me while i was trying to dry myself with serviettes. felt super dumb and clumsy. T.T throw face to the max thank you very much. :(
anywayy home soon after cause he still had his test to study for and i still have work to do. :(
and last but not least, it is 最 BRAVE 的 MAX'S BIRTHDAYY TOOOOO! HAHAHAHA
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE BRAVEST MAXXXXX!! :D:D:D
looking back today, though i was rather moody cause of my mood swing, it was a rather happy day. :) thank you!
SECRET SOCIETY (L)
hiak hiak hiak. had a secret society birthday celebration for all the jan babies last night. WOOHOO!!
i think our surprise was quite fail for some birthday babies? :( sorry. i think max was the most surprised one? HAHAHA. he came in mumbling to himself 'why so many people?' HAHAHA.
anyway dined at timbre and had a great time yoooo! photo takings like crazy and i look super chui :( and my eyes are like super small i dun even know why. :(
hahahaha. and i kept trying others' beer/whisky dry/alcoholic drinks. hahahaha. i think they just love to see my expression after drinking ah. keep telling me nice nice in the end the :/:/ alcoholic taste lingers on my tongue.
anywayyy on my to-do list ytd. i think i only fulfilled one. :(:( which is to write the notes which are the birthday notes for the jan babies. T.T T.T i am so lazy nowadays. :/ need to have more self-disciplineeeee!!!!!
okay bye!
i think our surprise was quite fail for some birthday babies? :( sorry. i think max was the most surprised one? HAHAHA. he came in mumbling to himself 'why so many people?' HAHAHA.
anyway dined at timbre and had a great time yoooo! photo takings like crazy and i look super chui :( and my eyes are like super small i dun even know why. :(
hahahaha. and i kept trying others' beer/whisky dry/alcoholic drinks. hahahaha. i think they just love to see my expression after drinking ah. keep telling me nice nice in the end the :/:/ alcoholic taste lingers on my tongue.
anywayyy on my to-do list ytd. i think i only fulfilled one. :(:( which is to write the notes which are the birthday notes for the jan babies. T.T T.T i am so lazy nowadays. :/ need to have more self-disciplineeeee!!!!!
okay bye!
Saturday, January 29, 2011
PAST MEMORIES.
sometimes, i feel like i have been neglecting too much things in life.
maybe it's time to take a step back and look around with what i have and what i have lost in the journey of life.
perhaps i have placed too much importance on some, and neglected those which did not seem as important, but still participated in my life at some point of time.
some of those whom i deemed as important to me left, and the memories between me and them have intense clarity due to the constant relieving of them.
as a result, those that did not seem as important then, left not much of an impression. but slowly, when i try my best to think back, i see blurry images but gradually, i recall those memories through the bits and pieces which was left behind.
i'm starting to regret. regret that i did not treasure people around me enough. i always thought i did. but apparently it was only my wishful thinking.
feeling kind of sad. sad that i forgot people too easily. sad that i only held onto the past that hurt me, that made me sad, and not those that made me smile and laugh.
i can move on really easily, as long as i want to, as long as i stop holding on. as soon as i see you as unimportant, you will be forgotten by me. and what's left would be bits and pieces of memories which i can barely remember.
all that happened to me in the past few years affected me so much, impacted me so much, changed me so much. i grew and learnt and matured.
and it's only now that i realise, before all the hurt i underwent, i had so many things and memories i treasured. and i need to recover them. recover those happy memories. those memories i had as a child.
i need to let go. let go of some things.
i need to stop relieving. stop relieving of the hurt.
i need to give myself a chance to start anew.
i cannot let what happened in the past affect me for who i am.
i cannot let it scare me. i cannot let them turn me into a coward. i need to be braver.
i need to learn how to trust again.
i want to be a piece of white paper again.
i cannot use what happened before to judge others. they are not the same. they are different people of different characters with different mindsets and thinking. i shldnt group them tgthr.
i need to remember that there are faults in everyone, and i shouldnt judge them. i shouldnt feel awkward just because they made a mistake. or because of the fault in them.
i need to be more forgiving. and after ranting about what unhappiness they have caused me, i should forgive and forget. i am someone who has faults as well. everyone is the same. no one is perfect. i need to remember these.
i need to treat people kinder. i need to be more helpful towards people. i need to be more courteous. i need to be braver and trust that what i do is right and not just be afraid of offending people.
i need to put faith in whatever i say and do and think, and not waver at the slightest objection or disagreement.
i need to have my own stand. and stand up to what i think is right and say no to what i think is wrong.
i know i can do these.
this is who i want to become.
i will become her.
i will become the her i want to be.
i trust me.
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